Birth Companions:

What are your experiences working on the birthing team?

Jerri answers that she’s had both positive and negative experiences. In one situation, a nurse was not very open to having her there. At one point, Jerri was supporting the mom’s wish to get out of bed and move around in opposition to the nurse’s orders to stay in bed. As far as Jerri could see, there was no medical reason for the mom to stay in bed and she felt it was part of her job as a doula to support the mom’s instincts about what was best for her labor process. The staff was not happy about Jerri’s perceived interference and after that tried to send her out of the room for errands. Jerri had to stand her ground and continue to emphasize that she was there to support the mom, not the staff, and would need to stay in the room to do so. Although it wasn’t a good experience, she thinks she handled it well.

A more positive experience happened when the doctor, nurse and even the midwife were supportive of having a doula present. They encouraged Jerri to support and comfort the mom and even offered suggestions and techniques for Jerri to use. The result of the cooperation by the team was that the mom felt wonderful and very proud of herself and her new baby.

After working with that particular team, they called on her services any time she happened to be in the hospital and they had a woman in labor. Although she did not have a previous relationship with the mom, she was able to offer her support. Some women were very grateful to have her with them. Overall, the team approach has lead to great outcomes for the moms.

Jerri reflects on how fathers have worked with her in the past. She notes that they often do not fully understand the birth process and can actually interfere with it. It is a fine line for her trying to decide whether to step in or not. In one case, the mother was wanting a natural childbirth, while the doctor wanted something else. The husband preferred to follow the doctor’s wishes and was criticizing his wife for wanting to stay with her plan. (This was the woman’s second baby, the man’s first) Finally, Jerri felt compelled to step in and tell the husband that his criticism was not helpful to the mom and he needed to offer support instead and save the criticism for after it was over. Unfortunately, the husband was not particularly swayed and still felt that the mom needed to comply with the doctor’s desires. At one point the father left the room, offering Jerri the chance to talk with the mom and ask how she wanted to handle things. The mom asked Jerri to do what she could to keep the father out of the room, which they managed to do and the mom proceeded to deliver naturally with the father almost missing the birth itself. It was a sticky situation trying to support the mom and not overstep boundaries with the father.

But every situation is different.

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